Have you heard of OrgasmicWays? Oh wow, Kinksters! Well have I got a treat for you! Have you ever wondered what it’s like to be in a submissive relationship? As a matter of fact, what is a submissive relationship? Well, I had the opportunity to catch up with OrgasmicWays, and they gave me the lowdown on everything I needed to know about a submissive relationship. Are you intrigued yet? Awesome! Then let’s get started.
To read my last interview with Diana Von Rigg click here.
DEFINE A SUBMISSIVE RELATIONSHIP
Defining a Submissive relationship, really differs from couple to couple. Some people have Submissive relationships, without the practice of BDSM. They tend to focus more on the connection. Dominance would be about emotional strength and guidance, while Submission would be about the need to let go and let someone else take the lead.
Whereas, others have Submissive Relationships, mainly based on the practice of BDSM. They might not even live together, yet they share that strong, unique connection through BDSM.
And then, there are many couples, like us, who are happily in the middle. I certainly have the need to let go—to give up total control—my entire body and soul. Not because I am forced to do it, but because I want to do it. And because I need to do it. While Pavel has the need to feel in charge, and to feel that power both emotionally and physically. And that we both fulfill that need for one another.
That, for me, is a Submissive Relationship.
ORGASMICWAYS ARE THERE TIMES YOU HAVE TO TURN IT DOWN? SWITCH IT OFF?
I don’t think there is really anything like having to turn it down. Not in our case, anyway. Sometimes, life just turns it down naturally. During the day, we are both busy. Pavel has a full-time job, while I juggle working on the Website and looking after our little 3-year-old.
When Pavel gets home after work, I have a list of things that still needs to be done by him. Pavel is quite the computer expert, so whatever I can’t do, he usually can. So, for a while, I am bossing him around, and he is asking me what to do.
Although I am controlling and dominant in daily life, it is not how our relationship functions naturally, and that can, at times, switch things off. This can also happen if we have a disagreement. Pavel might do something that really angers me, and in that time, I don’t feel submissive. Quite the opposite—I feel like killing him!
The same goes for him. At times, I make him so angry that he doesn’t want to spank me—because he knows I would love it!
But, when we are both calm again, our natural Submissive connection returns, and everything falls back into place. Whether it is through Sex, by giving him a massage, or simply kneeling in front of him to wash his feet, we have our ways of getting back to our Submissive relationship—because that is who we are. And that is, what feels the best to us.
DID YOU HAVE NON-SUBMISSIVE RELATIONSHIPS? HOW DID YOU GET INTO THE SUBMISSIVE WORLD?
I will keep my past relationships secret, but I can say that they were very kinky in their own ways. Just not a Submissive Relationship as I have now. Although I knew I craved dominance and control, especially sexually, I had not met anyone I could give myself to in that way.
Now, I realise why my past relationships failed. I completely missed this letting go. Being submissive is part of who I am.
In light of this, it was my partner who opened the doors to the Submissive world, and together we just kind of grew.
HOW DOES THE LIFESTYLE TRANSCEND INTO EVERYDAY LIFE?
In daily life, I like to be in control. I don’t like surprises; I prefer to know what will happen next, and my mind is always busy. I like to organise and have things go my own way.
As for Pavel, he is quite the opposite. He loves surprises, is quite content not knowing what will happen next, and has the ability to switch off his mind when it is needed. He also happily follows my suggestions, although the final word will often be his.
However, how the Submissive life transcends into daily life is better explained below:
For example, we both have our own bathrooms. But, his shower is so much easier to work than mine, so I use his. And, at times, I might forget to clean it up after use (hands full with a little toddler). Now, when that happens, he spanks me there and then. Actually, he points me to the bathroom, and spanks me as I am picking up the mess. The same happens when I put the spoons together with the forks, or just the forks with the knives.
It also transcends through sex. We love BDSM. I am Submissive, while he is Dominant. And I NEVER turn him down for sex. Whenever he takes control, his actions turn me on so much that I don’t have the willpower to say no. Some days of the month, I can negotiate, and he will contentedly settle for another sexual favour. Sex is definitely a major connection between us both.
But, how our Dom-Sub connection transcends the most, is actually in our personalities. Pavel is thriving when he feels that control and power. It gives him confidence and strength in daily life. As for me, I thrive when I can just let go emotionally and physically. And that is exactly what Pavel gives to me. I trust him so much that I no longer crave being in control when I am with him. And the submission I feel for him stems from that trust. Together with the gratefulness that he holds the power to free my mind, even if it is just for a while.
HOW DO YOU MEET SOMEONE PREPARED TO EMBARK ON A SUBMISSIVE LIFESTYLE?
How we met was quite accidental. We were both members in the same gym, and that’s how we met.
He was sitting in a Smoothie Bar, while I was training. I could feel his eyes staring at me all the time, so I purposely walked by him, and then turned around to catch him staring at my butt.
I smiled. He asked me out for a smoothie, and that’s how it began.
We developed a fitness-based friendship and were in regular contact with one another. I knew he fancied me, but for some reason I thought he was going to be too vanilla for me! However, I was so wrong about that. After 2 years of friendship, he got me drunk and kissed me. And that was it; I was head over heels. There was an insanely animalistic attraction between us, and although we were both quite inexperienced with BDSM, it did not take long for the whips and chains to come out. Together, we went on this journey, and our relationship just grew into a Submissive Relationship.
Now, fast-forward another 5 years, and here we are as a family with a little three-year-old monster.
IS THERE AN ONLINE COMMUNITY FOR LIFESTYLE SUBMISSIVENESS?
Unfortunately, there were not many kink-friendly platforms out there. There is Only Fans and Fetlife, but they are not really a platform for kinksters to meet one another.
But now, we have built OrgasmicWays which you can join here.
What started off as a fun website for adult Sex Games and BDSM manuals has quickly developed into a kink-oriented Social Platform.
As we were trying to promote our Erotic Games business, we found out that Social Media was pretty ruthless towards Adult Content. It is not a matter of “if” your account gets deleted; it is when. So, this got us thinking.
We need a platform on which we have the freedom to express sexual ideas, and on which nudity is allowed. And this is exactly what we have built. There is an activity wall, many kinky chat groups, and each member can make their own gallery and upload as many pictures as they want. So far, people love it. We just have few on, but they continue to return and leave the best feedback.
We also offer an Erotic Marketplace, where small-time sellers/artists/creators/writers… can promote their products.
Presently, we need more people to sign up. Every single member helps. We are working around the clock to promote our Website, but the best form of promotion is by word of mouth.
Everyone can help by signing up, and we can create the platform on which you have the freedom to be you.
There we have it, Kinksters! A massive thank you to Orgasmicways for your insightful and fresh perspective on submissive relationships. It was an honor to have had the opportunity to work with you, guys!
Kinksters, you can also check out Orgasmicways brand new, Kink-positive website here.
I hope you enjoyed reading this submissive relationship interview blog. Are you interested in submissive relationships? Do you know someone who might be? Let’s support each other so please feel free to SHARE this blog post with others. Feel free to hit me up on Twitter @podofeleus and Instagram @Podopheleus.
Much Kink Love