Why I created a private support group for Submissive Men 

Hi there, Submissive Men!

As many of you are aware, I created a private submissive men support group. For those interested in joining, I wanted to breakdown what the group is about? 

In consideration of the foregoing, let’s get friggin’ started, shall we?

What is the Submissive Men Support Group? 

The submissive men support group is a safespace, a judgment-free zone solely for submissive men! This group also welcomes Transgender, T-girls, Sissies etc.

How can I find the Submissive Men Support Group? 

I created the private Submissive Men Support group on Twitter. 

I live in India, can I join the group? 

Anyone in the world can join the group.

Can a novice join the group? 


How many members are there in the group? 

As it currently stands, there are 65 members in the group. 

How can I join? 

By simply sending me a DM on Twitter or by sending an email to kink@podopheleus.com.

Is there a fee to join?


What does the group consist of?

The private group consists of asking questions, sharing experiences, feelings, and to give positive encouragement and support when needed. Through the exchange of views and experiences, insights and thoughts, I really feel that submissive men can learn from one another.

For example, some of you might feel vulnerable, ashamed, and alone because of your subby side, or experiencing severe sub-drop. Or… you have just booked your first session and feeling super anxious, so you ask the group for advice. Or you’ve just had the most amazing session experience and you want to share it. Or you just realized that you may have made a huge freaking mistake, by sending monies to a fake domme, and as soon as you blocked her, she started cyber bullying you, saying that she will post your details/pictures all over the net. And YOU have no friggin’ idea what to do in this situation.

Additionally, if you are a writer, artist, content creator, podcaster, Youtuber etc. Feel free to share your work in the group, and without any obligation, we share those posts to our followers. I believe submissive men should support one another, we should be working together, not competing, or be envious of one another.

Additionally, the private group can be utilized as an opportunity to make friends with like-minded people. For example, some have used the group to arrange meet ups at kinky venues such as pedestal or strapon parties etc.

What are the rules?

Always be kind because you don’t know what someone else might be going through. Always be respectful to one another and respect different opinions. No submissive man is better than the other. Please do not take screenshots of conversations and post it to public Twitter or any other social platforms. This is a private group, so all conversations must remain confidential within the group. Respect other people’s privacy.

What will happen if I break the rules?

Simply put, I will remove you from the group.

Why I created this private group for submissive men

Well, I think it goes back to my childhood a little bit. I had the desire to be dominated by women as far back as I can remember. Growing up, I felt a lot of shame and guilt for my desires. To be honest, for most of my life I felt a little lost, confused. I didn’t understand myself or like myself. I felt like I had no one to talk to. No one understands me etc etc.

I tried looking for submissive men role models, but there weren’t any around. Which is pretty bizarre, when you think about it. Everyone wants someone to look up to! And we don’t have that. Let me elaborate on this…. a closeted gay man might look up to George Michael. A newbie prodomme might look up to Miss Kim Rub! 

Learn more about Miss Kim Rub here.

If you are Transgender you might look up to Elliot Page. I ask the question again, who do submissive men look up to? Who do we turn to if we have questions? I only started to understand myself, when I embraced my subby side by visiting a prodomme.

Nevertheless, I still continued to face a number of challenges. For example, experiencing severe subdrop. I didn’t even know it had a name until I started experiencing it. At that time, I didn’t feel comfortable talking to my Mistress about it. So, who do I turn to for help? A lot of what I know, I learned from Google. I had to learn a lot of things the hard way on my own.

So I wanted to create a group that gives submissive men the support when they need it. Every month, I receive a significant number of emails, DMs from submissive men asking for my help. At times, I am able to help answer their questions and assist them with further advice. Having said that, in some cases, I’m not qualified or experienced enough to answer their questions.

So I will either ask them to join the group, if they are not on Twitter. I’ll ask the question to the group and advise them based on the group’s responses. Please bear in mind that I might have created the group, but I’m not the most experienced. I’ve only been in the kink scene for three and a half years. Some of the guys in the group have been in the kink scene for 15, 20, 30, 40 years. And this is why I wanted to create a group for sub men.

It goes back to what I said earlier, in relation to wanting to create a group that gives submissive men the support when they need it at any given point in time. I want sub men to feel like they are part of a community. I want submissive men to feel accepted.

Furthermore, I want to encourage submissive men to accept themselves, to accept their subby side, and to let go of all the shame and guilt. So If you feel a little lost, or you just want to be a part of a community, Drop me an e-mail or a message on Twitter. Kindly note that you will need to follow me on Twitter for the purpose of adding you to the group.

Testimonials/statements from members of the Submissive Men Support Group 

“This group means so much to me. A real essence for someone who is no way near to kink scene. The togetherness, the warmth and knowledgeable conversations, where everyone is ready to back each other. This is truly heartwarming.

Interestingly, we just don’t talk about kinks and fetishes (Well mostly), but we all share our experiences, guide one another, even take professional career advice. A place where you can be yourself and be who you are.”


“It’s a group with a variety of lifestyles and play types, a hell of a lot more knowledge than you can know what to do with. It’s great for advice and ideas and just generally chatting to other like-minded people. I’ve certainly found it useful.”


“You can be totally open without being judged in any way. No matter if you’re a hardcore kinkster or more into soft domination it’s so much fun to chat and learn. A great place to be and some guys have been really helpful for me so far. Thanks a lot.” ~


“Hi podopheleus, thanks so much for starting the group, I’m a guy in my 50’s who’s never been able to admit my submissive side only to the prodommes I’ve served who have been amazing, but to be able to communicate with others like yourself, tell your experiences and desires and the ups and downs of being us is such a relief thank you again.”


There we have it, Submissive Men! 

Kinksters let’s support each other – so please SHARE this article with others! Also, feel free to hit me up on Twitter @podofeleus and Instagram @Podopheleus.

Much Kink Love,


Advocate For Change 🙏🖤


P.s. check out more interviews and articles in relation to submissive men here.

Dr Das – submissive men, kinks & fetishes – Interview!

How I learned to stop worrying and accept being a Submissive!

Reflections on 40 years of Service as a Submissive Man

Coming Out(ish) as a submissive male by Tiny Monster

The Stigma of the Submissive Male by Thimble

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